Questionable line calls are a part of tennis.  I truly believe the majority of players regardless of age do their best to make honest calls.  Certainly players make mistakes and either miss a call (in or out) but they do not do it intentionally.  So what do you do when you run into a player who makes “creative line calls?”

The very first thing I tell players is that when they know for certain their opponent is cheating them it means they are literally minutes away from winning the match.  When a player turns to cheating what it really says is that in their mind they believe they can no longer beat their opponent straight up so they must revert to cheating.  Cheating or “creative line calls” are a tell tale sign that a player is about to crack in a match.  As long as the player on the receiving end of the cheating realizes that it is a sign of an opponent beginning to crack and keeps their emotions in check it can actually turn into a positive.

Perhaps the most important thing I tell a player is that no matter how many times they get cheated or think they got cheated NEVER intentionally cheat an opponent to try and even up the score.  For junior players you have to understand that telling a child it is ok to cheat, regardless of the circumstances, is giving permission to do something dishonorable.  Character development is so important for youth and at all times regardless we must always teach and take the high road.  My friend Coach Kriese sums it up best by saying, “never dishonor the game or bring shame to your family name.”

Those two pieces of information are real diamonds of wisdom to share with players in dealing with “creative line calls.”  If you are interest in a whole different way about calling lines take a look at the Fair Play Line Call System my friend, Coach Dave Fish, at Harvard wrote about.

I am going to come right out and say it.  I believe there is a real disconnect in how tennis is marketed in the United States to youth and their parents and it is holding the growth of the game back.  In my opinion the overwhelming majority of parents do not sign their children up for tennis because they want them to win a tournament, establish some ranking, get a college scholarship, or turn professional.  This is especially true at first with young children.  Parents sign their kids up for tennis for a variety of reasons but the bottom line is they want them to become involved in something that makes them a better person.  Trying to sell a parent on the idea that taking tennis lessons will get them a college scholarship, a ranking, or win a tournament does not meet the core needs and desires of a parent for their child.

Put yourself in the role of a parent or think specifically about you son or daughter for a moment…  I want to talk to the parent in you directly…

What is it that you want most for your child?

How do you define success for your child?

What do you fear most for your child as they grow up?

What kinds of values do you want your child to carry into their adulthood?

These are some pretty serious questions.  I do not even have children (just yet) but I regularly think about those same questions very deeply.  When I talk to parents about issues I see through the surface and understand their real desires and fears.  Parents want their children to grow up to be successful, hard-working, value-oriented, and someone who makes a real contribution to making the world a better place.

This is getting into some pretty deep stuff but think about it for just one second…

Why do you really sign your child up for tennis or any sport for that matter?

Do you sign them up because you believe they will win a trophy, get a college scholarship, or turn pro?

Do you sign them up just for something to do?

Or do you really sign them up because deep down inside you believe sports can teach them lessons on some level to become a better person?

I believe for the majority of parents sign their children up because deep down inside they believe there are things that can be learned through the sport that can make their children better people.  Lessons like the value of a work ethic, persistence, dealing with failure and success, developing confidence, and so many more.  Sure if they win a championship, get a college scholarship or even play professionally one day that would be great but it is not at the core of their reasons why.

In my coaching I certainly want to make the players I work with better athletes and tennis players.  However, first and foremost I believe in developing the person first.  Tennis and fitness just becomes the means in which I can have a positive effect on the life of a young person.  Certainly athletes get better at tennis but whenever possible I always teach lessons that, regardless of how far they go in tennis, will always have a lasting impact in their lives.  If a college scholarship, tournament win, or playing at a high level is within their grasp certainly it can become a performance goal to strive for but in the process I never lose sight of making the player a better person first and foremost.

If you are a parent interested in placing your child in a sport to make them a better person and looking for a coach who understands that need then reach out to me, follow the blog, join the email list and check out our summer tennis camp experience.  Tennis is the greatest game in the world, a wonderful metaphor for living life, and a gift you can give your child for a lifetime.

Now that our local tournament, the Fox Chapel Junior Open, is over I thought It would be a good time to discuss how a player should deal with losses.  First, it is important to have a little dose of reality and realize that in a tournament no matter how you slice it eventually there is only one player who does not suffer a loss.  In tennis you are going to lose a lot and it is important to develop the right attitude in dealing with losses.

The first step is in how you approach tournaments to begin with.  Certainly a player should prepare and enter the tournament looking to do their absolute best.  However, players at the junior level should focus on the process of improving over everything else.  The moment a player starts worrying about wins, losses, and their ranking above consistently improving is the exact moment they stop improving.  The approach absolutely has to be about the process versus the product.  With that in mind the tournament can be thought of as an assessment.  It is an opportunity to test out their skills.  Wins are passing the test and should be used to build confidence.  Losses on the other hand are a learning opportunity and should be used to discover where a player needs to focus their efforts to continue improving.  Blowing off a loss and not learning from it is a big mistake.  It is critical that once the emotion of the loss wears off a player revisits it, learns from it, and then takes that information back to the practice court.  It is a necessary step to feed into the cycle of improvement.

Cycle of Improvement – Coach Alex Slezak

A tournament can be looked at as an assessment.  In school an assessment or test is used to see where a student is lacking understanding so the teacher knows where to best focus their efforts.  The teacher then gives another assessment to see if their efforts paid off.  A trainer assesses a client’s fitness level, designs programming to elicit adaptation, and then reassess to see if the program worked.  I think you are getting my point here…

To wrap this all up, junior players should focus first and foremost on the process of improvement over the product of wins and losses.  Wins should build confidence and confirm their efforts in training are paying off.  Losses should be used to identify weaknesses and then training designed to improve in those areas.  Areas of improvement can vary from conditioning, technical stroke work, shot-selection, routines between points, and so much more.  One of the best ways to really dig into learning from a loss is by charting specific aspects of a match but that is for a whole other blog post.

With the Fox Chapel Junior Open coming up on August 5-9 I thought it would be a good time to give some advice to parents of both first-timers and veteran junior tournament players.

I want to start off by disclosing that I am not yet a parent but I can sympathize with the feelings and emotions you go through watching your children compete. I know that if I am ever fortunate enough to be a father I would do anything for my children.  I understand how seeing your child in pain from a loss is difficult.  The truth is in a tennis tournament all but a few players are going to lose at some point in time.  The pain of losing is difficult however I want to see if I can give you a different perspective for a moment.  When a child comes off the court crying from a loss it is difficult to watch.  As a parent of course your first reaction is to attempt to take away their pain but take a moment to really understand why they are in pain.  They are in pain not because they lost but because they care.  They invested a lot in improving their tennis game and it hurts to come up short.  Think about something in your life you worked really hard for and it did not work out like you planned, plain and simple it hurts.  This kind of pain is natural and it can actually be a good thing.  Instead of trying to immediately take their pain away point out to your son or daughter that it hurts not because they lost but because they care and caring is an important and nobel thing.  In fact, it is a red flag when a player losses and does not care about it.  When that scenario happens it shows the player is really not engaging in their tennis game and that is a problem.  Pain is a necessary part of the game, growth, and improvement.  Remember, there will always be breakdowns before breakthroughs.

Another very important thing to remember is that there is a triangular relationship between the player, coach, and parent.  The role of the coach is to mentor, teach, and develop the player.  The role of the parent is always first and foremost to be a parent.  Remaining a parent can become a little difficult on match day because we all want our children to have a great performance and sometimes the parent begins to coach because the coach is not there.  I am not saying it is a bad thing to remind your son or daughter to warm-up or help them check in, especially if they are young or this is their first tournament.  The first few tournaments are nerve racking for players and parents because it is all new and a big learning experience.  The big thing to remember is to let your child know that you love them unconditionally.  Win or lose you love them just the same.  Being angry with your child because they lost is never something I have seen be a positive for the long-term relationship.  When a child knows their parents love them unconditionally they feel much more comfortable to have the freedom to fail.  That means they can go out to compete putting it all on the line knowing no matter what happens their parents will love them just the same.  In my experiences this approach is much better for the parent-child relationship in the long-term.  When a child knows their parents love them regardless of the outcome it improves the chances for a solid performance by relieving some stress in an already stressful environment.

Finally, watching your son or daughter play a match can be downright difficult.  What does a parent do cheer, clap, be silent?  FIrst, It is hard to watch your child compete knowing you have zero control over what is going on.  All you can do is watch it happen.  If you pay close enough attention you will notice how often your child looks up at you right after points.  They miss a shot in the net and they look up at you.  They hit a great shot to win the point and they look up at you.  They are looking up to see your reaction.  They do this because they are looking for your approval,  after all you are their parent and the single most influential person in their lives.  The very best thing parents can do for their child during the match is to remain neutral with your emotions.  That is easier said then done but give them a look of encouragement when they make mistakes and looks of encouragement when they are successful.  Just encourage them to do their best, after all that is all parents and coaches can ask.

I hope this post helps give you some ideas on how to better handle the stress of being a parent of a junior tennis player.  And do not let me scare you either believe it or not tournaments are some of the most enjoyable and fun experiences of a junior player’s career.  It is wonderful to spend time together as a family and make lifelong memories.  It also is fun to test out some of the skills they have been learning and practicing.  If you like the post please share it and leave a comment or question below.  I would be happy to keep the conversation going.

If you are interested in learning more check out my friend and fellow coach Frank Giampaolo’s ebook The Tennis Parent’s Bible.  It is full of wisdom to help parents successfully navigate junior tournament tennis and maintain a healthy and positive relationship with their son or daughter.

What is it that separates a beginner from an advanced tennis player?  How can a 15 year-old be a beginner and a 10 year-old advanced?  This gets confusing so let me sum it up in a simple phrase.  Beginning tennis players use their hands to swing the racket, intermediates use their arms, and advanced players use their entire body.

What separates players’ abilities is the integration and coordination of their stroke.  If you watch a beginner they will mainly use their hands and wrists to make contact with the ball.  An intermediate player will be slightly more integrated and swing primarily with their arm.  Finally, an advanced player will use the entire body to swing, generating power from the ground up.

This concept of integration is nothing more than coordination or athletic ability.  It is not unique to tennis, it applies in all sports.  An advanced baseball pitcher simply has a more integrated overhand throwing pattern.  A sprinter who integrates their arms and legs will always be faster than one who just utilizes the legs.  A boxer who just uses their arms will always be weaker than one who generates power from the legs and hips in their punch.  I think my point is coming across here.

So how does a young athlete get integrated movement patterns?

Young athletes, regardless of the sport, become coordinated with practice and a variety of movement experiences.  It is that simple, there are no short-cuts.  Let looks at tennis for example, the more balls a beginner hits the more the brain seeks out to perform that movement pattern efficiently and the arm becomes integrated with the hands.  The more tennis balls the intermediate player hits the more the brain seeks out efficiency and integration of the trunk, hips, and legs develops.  So how is it that a 15 year-old can still be a beginner or intermediate?  They simply have not hit enough tennis balls to develop an integrated movement pattern.  How can a 10 year-old be advanced?  Well in those 10 years the player has hit enough tennis balls to make the pattern integrated.  It is that simple.

So why is it some players become integrated faster than others?

I think some players become integrated in their movement patterns faster than others for two main reasons.  First, the more movement and athletic experiences a child has under their belt the easier it is to transfer between sports.  For example, it is always easier to teach children who already own an integrated overhand throwing pattern to serve because the transfer is simple.  When children are coordinated and have lots of kinesthetic (body) awareness it becomes easier to learn new athletic skills.  Second, quality instruction helps tremendously.  With the right instruction a coach can get a child to feel the difference between swinging with their hands, arms, and entire body.  They key to the instruction though is getting children to feel the difference.  A coach can talk and explain and demonstrate until they are blue in the face but children cannot see themselves perform skills, they can only feel themselves do it.  In my experiences if I can get a child to feel what an integrated swing feels like it sticks very quickly.  It is much easier to repeat a feeling than it is piece together a bunch of verbal cues.

So what can parents do to help their child become integrated?

Parents can help with the process in a couple of ways.  First, hit or toss tennis balls to your child often.  The more practice you give them the faster they pick it up.  Second, do not limit them to just playing tennis.  In fact, let your children do as many sports and activities as they want, especially when they are very young.  The more movement experiences, the more overall kinesthetic (body) awareness and coordination they develop.  Finally, do not worry too much about perfect technique, instead focus on their effort.  When a children is praised for their effort, especially from such an influential person as their Mom or Dad, it will motivate them to practice tons and there is no short-cut to collecting practice hours.